Shop Mobile More Submit  Join Login
When I was lost you found me
So now you’re lost let me find you
Fall into my arms sweetheart
No questions, it’s what lovers do

Cradled in my arms tonight
Till the morning after ensues
Maybe then you can see things
From a different point of view

We can sit here all night babe
I’m no saint to offer guidance
Just some whispered words of love
I’ll be here when you break your silence

There is no doctrine of life
But only second hand wisdom
Each person is their own jailor
And inmate begging for freedom

Some of those are there by choice
Others will just misplace the key
You are indeed the latter
But please know you can rely on me

May this torrid time tick away
This is no requiem to our love
As I refuse to mourn the end
Of you, of me and of us
7x
Add a Comment:
 
:iconnightlynxness:
nightlynxness Featured By Owner Mar 25, 2013
This... is beautiful. It's incredibly sweet but not cheezy at all. So touching, it just kind of makes you want to love and be loved like that. *applause*
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Mar 26, 2013   General Artist
:) Glad it's not cheesy, I do try to avoid that. Thank you!
Reply
:iconwildylynx:
wildylynx Featured By Owner Mar 25, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
There is no doctrine of life
But only second hand wisdom
Each person is their own jailor
And inmate begging for freedom'
wow!!
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Mar 26, 2013   General Artist
:) glad you liked that bit. Thanks for the comment!
Reply
:iconenlightenedenigma:
EnlightenedEnigma Featured By Owner Mar 5, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
AWWWWWWW!!!! <33333 this poem absolutely melted my heart it's so so soooo sweet!! What a lucky girl! ;) :hug:
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Mar 5, 2013   General Artist
:) aww thank you, very kind of you! :hug:
Reply
:iconxxagonisticmiseryxx:
xxAgonisticMiseryxx Featured By Owner Mar 3, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
This is amazing. Truly, amazing.
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Mar 3, 2013   General Artist
thank you so much :)
Reply
:icondkarndezolus:
DkarnDezolus Featured By Owner Mar 2, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
This means so much to me, I lost my everything, she left me alone and all I ever wanted was her love. This is so beautiful, whoever you wrote this for is a wonderfully lucky person and from someone who's been there...

Don't let her go, don't EVER let her go and if you do, just remember, it's not the end. It may seem like it, it feels impossible to stand, but you have the strength to do so. Stay strong, stay amazing :)
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Mar 3, 2013   General Artist
I am really sorry to hear about your situation. I can imagine how it feels.

I have been lucky in a way. The girl I fell in love with is not able to be with me but we have managed to stay best friends. It's the most we can be and we are learning to accept that :)

thanks for your comment, i really do appreciate it.
Reply
:icondkarndezolus:
DkarnDezolus Featured By Owner Mar 3, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
It's like my heart was ripped out, I'm still picking up the pieces well she treats me like I'm invisible.

We stay friends too but she can be...insensitive. It's odd they say it's usually the guy who's like that haha.

You're very welcome. This is a beautiful poem. :)
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Mar 4, 2013   General Artist
yeah, people are strange sometimes. They act insensitively and its hard to know how they can live with themselves.

Anyway I hope things get better for you :)
Reply
:icondkarndezolus:
DkarnDezolus Featured By Owner Mar 4, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Yeah, it totally shattered me, because I didn't just love her, I idolised her. I'll never do that again haha.

Thank you. :) *hugs*
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Mar 4, 2013   General Artist
:) :hug:
Reply
:iconlacesnflowers:
lacesnflowers Featured By Owner Mar 2, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
This is really good, I wish I had the words to describe how beautiful this piece of art is.
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Mar 2, 2013   General Artist
:) You are being very kind with all these comments, thank you!
Reply
:iconlacesnflowers:
lacesnflowers Featured By Owner Mar 2, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I only spoke the truth about my feelings. And you're very welcome.
Reply
:iconcuddleslut17:
CuddleSlut17 Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
This is beautiful. I absolutely love the third stanza.
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Mar 2, 2013   General Artist
thank you :)
Reply
:iconmockingjay1256:
MockingJay1256 Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
This is honestly the most beautiful thing I've read today!!!! Thank you~ its beautiful. :heart:
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Mar 2, 2013   General Artist
:) that means a lot, thank you.
Reply
:iconmockingjay1256:
MockingJay1256 Featured By Owner Mar 12, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
*takes a bow* you're welcome :) keep up the great work!
Reply
:icontijonwolfsmajestys:
TijonWolfsMajestys Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
i love this, i seriously want to cry, youve made me a wuss :cries: perfect view of what love should be
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2013   General Artist
:) aww well sorry for the tears but thank you for the comment :hug:
Reply
:icontijonwolfsmajestys:
TijonWolfsMajestys Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
Youre welcome ^^ lol
Reply
:iconcoffeecuppup:
CoffeeCupPup Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Very sweet and beautiful :)
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2013   General Artist
thank you :
Reply
:icondarken-drekon:
Darken-Drekon Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I Really really love this, the wording is perfect and it really hit home for me. Thank you for sharing.
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2013   General Artist
thank you for reading and commenting :)
Reply
:iconmrjafo:
MrJafo Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2013  Hobbyist Photographer
Nice work. Very expressive. Idk about free verse though. It still seems bouncy. ABCB.
I do like it though. :nod:
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2013   General Artist
yeah, I always struggle when it comes to knowing which category to put my poems into. Lol i got shouted at a few times and told to put it in free verse. Can i ask what you would put it in? You see i have never studied poetry so am not really that familiar with things like that :)

thank you
Reply
:iconmrjafo:
MrJafo Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2013  Hobbyist Photographer
I do like the poem. As for what category, idk. Keep it in that doesn't matter.
I have a free verse poem I wrote in my gallery. If the link doesn't work, then it's called My Soul Reunion. There's three parts.
Hopefully some of the my recent pics aren't too....:-(
Just ignore.

Http://fav.me/d7wooz
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Mar 2, 2013   General Artist
That's a very good poem, in fact i really like it. Also I noticed the date. You have been on here a long time :)

lol I did notice your latest pics. Doesn't bother me at all. They're just bodies, everyone has one lol
Reply
:iconmrjafo:
MrJafo Featured By Owner Mar 2, 2013  Hobbyist Photographer
Thanks. I appreciate that.

I'm going through a phase right now.

Keep up the poetry. Looking forward to more.
Reply
:iconclickybiro:
clickybiro Featured By Owner Feb 28, 2013   General Artist
Great poem!...if I was to make a suggestion, I feel the last line would have more emotional power without the 'and' so that it just read: "of you, of me, of us".... However, either way it is a great piece of work, with a beautiful message, that as others have said wasn't cheesy at all. Enjoyed reading it! :)
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2013   General Artist
thanks for the comment :)

you know at first i wrote it exactly how you suggested. But then I became obsessed with counting syllables and didnt know if it threw the rhythm off a little. I am still not sure. I will probably keep it as it is now but i have definitely taken your feedback on board.

thank you :)
Reply
:iconcreepingshadow04:
creepingshadow04 Featured By Owner Feb 28, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Amazing poem, it just leaves you speechless its just that good. Great work.
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2013   General Artist
aww thats great to know, thank you :)
Reply
:iconcupcakekitten20:
cupcakekitten20 Featured By Owner Feb 28, 2013
That is so sweet and cute :heart:
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2013   General Artist
:) thank you
Reply
:iconfunky-not-a-junky:
funky-not-a-junky Featured By Owner Feb 28, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
i feel as tho you have read a chapter from my heart and soul. these words are beautiful and i hope they change someones life.
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2013   General Artist
aww thats very sweet, thank you for the comment :)
Reply
:icongentleman-status:
Gentleman-Status Featured By Owner Feb 28, 2013
Very lovely!
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2013   General Artist
thank you! :)
Reply
:icongentleman-status:
Gentleman-Status Featured By Owner Mar 3, 2013
You're very welcome. ^_^
Reply
:iconleijing:
Leijing Featured By Owner Feb 28, 2013  Student General Artist
Very well done, but not overly so. A nice sort of realism, bending the reader's focus but not rose tinting it.
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2013   General Artist
That's really nice to hear. It was exactly what I had hoped to achieve :)
Reply
Add a Comment:
 
×

:iconrifle1980: More from Rifle1980


Featured in Collections

Stories and Literature by GoldenJay097

Literature by FrZnSquid

Literature by BlackRoseMaidenVI


More from DeviantArt



Details

Submitted on
February 28, 2013
File Size
1.0 KB
Link
Thumb

Stats

Views
1,865 (1 today)
Favourites
202 (who?)
Comments
76
×