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So long as you furnish me with a window
And a steel frame bed in a corner of a room
I’ll endeavour to keep the pane transparent
To give my eyes a crystal clear view of the moon

Regardless of what phase you are going through
Whether it be half, crescent, full, blue or new
You have never once shown me your dark side
But so many times I have shown mine to you

But tranquillity can be seen on a clear night
Tides roll through my veins as thoughts flood to my pen
Of all the ancestors that have gone before me
Who've had the same moon looking down over them

So long as you furnish me with a window
And a steel frame bed in a corner of a room
You are more than welcome to keep the pain coming
As my true life source is out of reach from you

Regardless of what phase I am going through
Whether I feel sombre or jovial in mood
It’s easy to call me a loner or lunatic
Maybe I just see things from a different point of view

So now I look to the skies on a clear night
Knowing there’ll be no one to listen any time soon
But my concerns have dispersed with the clouds
As from now on I will tell my secrets to the moon
realityisfarlessexciting
Add a Comment:
 
:iconstormygirl335:
stormygirl335 Featured By Owner Nov 22, 2013
Beautifuly written, the lines flow so well, it's just a great poem~
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Nov 22, 2013   General Artist
thank you very much :)
Reply
:iconaurora-celest:
aurora-celest Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2013
Your soul is beautiful. Thank you for creating this.
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Nov 22, 2013   General Artist
that is such a nice thing to say :) thank you
Reply
:icondandelawesome:
DanDelAwesome Featured By Owner Nov 20, 2013
This specific couple of lines
"It’s easy to call me a loner or lunatic
Maybe I just see things from a different point of view"
seem to treat the reader and the persona as if one is antagonistic of the other. Who can relate to a poem that they're being near explicitly told that they couldn't understand? It's but a small part of the poem, I know, but the reek of cliche' from it puts a grimace on my face that is a little hard to shake; it was like watching someone trip up and graze their chin. It's my only criticism. Otherwise I think the poem has some beautiful imagery. The relationship seems to be serene and personal without being too overt and the fixed form is a real breath of fresh air in an environment that can seem at times dominated with self-indulgent free-verse. I've only got that one criticism.
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2013   General Artist
thank you for the comment and the critique. I really do appreciate you taking time out to not only read my poem but to offer your thoughts too :)
Reply
:iconbunocerous:
bunocerous Featured By Owner Nov 20, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
"Tides roll through my veins as thoughts flood to my pen
Of all the ancestors that have gone before me
Who've had the same moon looking down over them"
Powerful, truly powerful.
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2013   General Artist
:) glad you enjoyed that part. I appreciate your comment :) thanks!
Reply
:iconcutiewolf15668:
cutiewolf15668 Featured By Owner Nov 20, 2013
 love it
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2013   General Artist
thanks :)
Reply
:iconaldwarke:
aldwarke Featured By Owner Nov 20, 2013
I love the poem and all that it evokes. A really good conception.
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2013   General Artist
thank you :)
Reply
:iconsonicartisto:
SonicArtisto Featured By Owner Nov 20, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
nice
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2013   General Artist
thank you :)
Reply
:iconbenhammonds:
BenHammonds Featured By Owner Nov 20, 2013   Writer
Great!!! :D
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2013   General Artist
thanks Ben! :)
Reply
:iconbenhammonds:
BenHammonds Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2013   Writer
you are welcome :D my pleasure
Reply
:iconcrystallized-skies:
crystallized-skies Featured By Owner Nov 20, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Simply beautiful. I love the flow and the rhyming. 
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2013   General Artist
thank you, I appreciate you taking time to read and comment :)
Reply
:iconjmfirefly325:
JMFireFly325 Featured By Owner Nov 20, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Very beautifully written, love this one! :butterfly: :D
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2013   General Artist
really glad you like it :) thank you
Reply
:iconjmfirefly325:
JMFireFly325 Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Welcome hun! :D
Reply
:iconsteponmeandyoudie:
StepOnMeAndYouDie Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Wow...You are such a poet! I like your poem...Imma favorite thisTanz 
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2013   General Artist
:) thanks for the fave and the comment!
Reply
:iconsteponmeandyoudie:
StepOnMeAndYouDie Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Your welcome friend:)
Reply
:iconnisakine:
Nisakine Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2013
I truly like this ^.^
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2013   General Artist
aww thank you :)
Reply
:iconinverted-shadows:
Inverted-Shadows Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
so beautiful
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2013   General Artist
thank you :)
Reply
:iconmaironmatos:
maironmatos Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2013
An ode to the moon, beautiful loved it!
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2013   General Artist
Thank you, i appreciate the comment :)
Reply
:icondustyscarecrow:
DustyScarecrow Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I really like this! It spoke to me. :)
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2013   General Artist
thank you! glad you liked it :)
Reply
:icondustyscarecrow:
DustyScarecrow Featured By Owner Nov 22, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
You're quite welcome! :D
Reply
:iconmoonlark91:
Moonlark91 Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2013  Hobbyist Artisan Crafter
this poem is.. haunting to say the least. it has a beautiful flow and rythm to it, and it is something i can truely relate to. being one who has always been enraptured with the moon,this poem is a truely relateable and stunning piece
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2013   General Artist
really glad you like it especially since you are a fellow moon lover :)
Reply
:iconmoonlark91:
Moonlark91 Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2013  Hobbyist Artisan Crafter
that i am ^^ was born on a blue moon, my middle name is diane and  the moon is constantly showing up in my life. ^^
Reply
:iconcrescentofthemoon:
crescentofthemoon Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2013
this is so cool!!! i absolutely love it! it is really relatable too ^-^
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2013   General Artist
thank you!
Reply
:iconcrescentofthemoon:
crescentofthemoon Featured By Owner Nov 20, 2013
you're welcome :)
Reply
:iconsewing0109:
SEwing0109 Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Technically, you would be a lunatic. Nice poem.
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2013   General Artist
thank you :)
Reply
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November 19, 2013
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