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Today her parents ask how her day has been
By now the answer has been well rehearsed
She insists to them that everything is fine
But the reality is the reverse

In fact she’s the antonym of the word ‘fine’
Inadequate, unsatisfactory
This is due to her creatively cursed mind
Steeped in a world of such simplicity

Yesterday friends asked how she has been coping
Waiting for their turn to talk, do they care?
They just see a happy, contented princess
Not a pensive, vacant, glazed over stare

In fact she’s the opposite of contented
Restless and at war with reality
Battling feelings of alienation
From unsupportive friends and family

Tomorrow strangers will ask her what is wrong
But in white lies she has become well versed
Knowing that the tar black pit of torrid truth
Will not dilute and only make things worse

She’s living the antonym of the word ‘truth’
But her lies are not designed to betray
Just to cover the cracks and to smother those
Who aren’t part of her daily masquerade
Thank you to my good friend Lena :iconmexicanpedo: for inspiring me to write this with her wonderful gif [link]

Both her and Dzeni (who share the account together) are extremely talented, two of my favourite deviants and should definitely be checked out.

thank you :)
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:iconitallant:
iTallaNT Featured By Owner Oct 26, 2014
I don't read poetry often... because in all honesty most of it doesn't connect with me at all. (either because it's too simplified or the message too abstract) But I will say this, your poetry is absolutely amazing. I've only just started reading through your gallery and have found several that I really felt a strong connection too.

This one in particular calls to me, as though it is a mirror of myself. Not once when I have turned to other people and received true understanding or aid, and yet everyone turns to me. After a point, as other deviants bellow have said, you simply stop trying to explain and internalize everything. You adopt a mask for everyone to see and try your hardest to keep the veneer from cracking. It becomes second nature, to the point where as an individual you fail to recognize your own feelings and needs. Everything is suppressed for years, for decades; until your mind and soul and personality snap, it feels as though you've been torn in two. Then even as this transpires your tendencies are hard to break. While you may feel like you are dead or dying, subjected to some cruel fate, your second nature is there... picking up the pieces and gluing them back onto the that mask.

In some ways it makes you strong: dependable for others, rational of mind, able to move on from difficult situations with no obvious effect. But many end up breaking completely and seeking death. So in all truth, while others claim to envy me, this is a fate I wish for no one; because one day it will consume everything.

On a slightly lighter note, when it comes to telling people that your fine, eventually your mind finds ways of telling people how you truly feel without uttering the actual words. For instance (using Aerosmith's definition) the word "fine" means "Fucked Up, Insecure, Neurotic, and Emotional." But the person you are talking too will never know what you truly meant. 
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:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Oct 27, 2014   General Artist
hey there :)

thank you so much for the comment.

I really appreciate you taking time to come and tell me how you can relate to some of my poems. In such a beautiful way too. Comments like this mean such a lot to me and become part of the poem i submit. I hope other people see the comment and can not only relate to the poem but the words you wrote too.

thanks again :)
Reply
:iconitallant:
iTallaNT Featured By Owner Oct 29, 2014
No problem, your work is something worth commenting on.
You have a wonderful talent. No matter what people say or what happens in life, keep on writing.
I look forward to seeing your future verse.
Reply
:iconskyesteiner:
SkyeSteiner Featured By Owner May 30, 2013  Student Writer
There are moments that you are just taken aback and you can't particularly comprehend your own feelings. I have to admit, this is definitely one of those moment.
While reading I empathized and I couldn't decide whether she should be proud of how she strong she is for holding everything in or how the void will continue eating away what's left of her heart. It amazes me how brave she is, but at the same time it worries me...like she might just try to get use to that unhealthy lifestyle until her sanity dissolves.

Oh don't mind me, I'm just really thinking of some people and how it drives me crazy that they don't realize that they don't have to be martyrs all the time...but you know...it complicated

Once again, you're writing astounds me! It almost seems like every time I read your poems, it hits me with revelation (and it pretty much attunes to what's happening to me). Thank you! Gah I'm so talkative!
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner May 30, 2013   General Artist
:) i love your comments and how you are so talkative.

it's really nice that you can relate too. Obviously not great that you have been in some of the situations but good to know that other people go through similar things.

thanks so much again :)
Reply
:iconwickedsoulsbook:
wickedsoulsbook Featured By Owner Apr 25, 2013  Student Writer
I have know that feeling of lying to those who only pretend to care. they would never understand how someone is truly feeling so why waste your breath trying to explain.
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Apr 26, 2013   General Artist
it is a beautiful moment when you find someone who does listen and does genuinely care. They dont come around very often though.

thanks for the comment :)
Reply
:iconpixie-stixx:
Pixie-Stixx Featured By Owner Apr 22, 2013
This is my life >.<
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:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Apr 22, 2013   General Artist
awww i am sorry to hear that :(
Reply
:iconpixie-stixx:
Pixie-Stixx Featured By Owner Apr 22, 2013
yeah but I will live it makes you stronger :)
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:iconcamilah:
camilah Featured By Owner Apr 17, 2013
I pick you as todays Poem writer on my blog. This is a awesome poem:heart:
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:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Apr 18, 2013   General Artist
thank you so much, I really do appreciate that :)
Reply
:iconcamilah:
camilah Featured By Owner Apr 18, 2013
Welcome:)
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:iconpereyga:
Pereyga Featured By Owner Apr 3, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I really enjoyed reading that =)
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:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Apr 3, 2013   General Artist
thank you, glad you enjoyed it :)
Reply
:iconpereyga:
Pereyga Featured By Owner Apr 3, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
^-^
Reply
:iconchels-luvs-chicken:
chels-luvs-chicken Featured By Owner Mar 30, 2013
This is amazing. I love the tone and mood that's set. It's something almost everyone can relate to and you did an amazing job of conveying that.
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Mar 31, 2013   General Artist
thank you so much :) It's really good to hear that.
Reply
:iconangelkae:
AngelKae Featured By Owner Mar 29, 2013
I wonder if you understand just how many people you've described in this poem...
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Mar 30, 2013   General Artist
that is so nice to hear :) It means a lot if anyone finds something I write relatable.
Reply
:iconsigilsmonolith:
SIGILSMONOLITH Featured By Owner Mar 29, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
highly enthralling hmm...it seems i am unable to describe in words how heartfelt this is
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Mar 29, 2013   General Artist
its more than enough to know you enjoyed it and it touched you in some way :)

thank you.
Reply
:iconcskadoz:
cskadoz Featured By Owner Mar 28, 2013   General Artist
whoa . . . this is way deep dark mood and smothering truth. as a guy, i applaud your frank and deliberate honesty. this is why guys coat there walls with teflon. very well writ. :clap: :hug:
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Mar 28, 2013   General Artist
thank you! :)
Reply
:iconmexicanpedo:
mexicanpedo Featured By Owner Mar 28, 2013
I am only repeating myself by saying that you're a truly talented writer.

This poem touched every single aspect I had in mind with that gif, if not even more because I basically thought that the gif alone would be the typical "I'm not fine- blah" thing to people, but you kinda made the message be more intense, more relatable for everyone and I think that's pretty amazing.

Lena
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Mar 28, 2013   General Artist
hey Lena :)

Thank you so much for the comment. I am really relieved you like it. I wanted you to like it because it was your work that inspired it. I actively look to your page for inspiration when I am struggling and that is exactly what I got.

thanks again! :)
Reply
:iconmexicanpedo:
mexicanpedo Featured By Owner Apr 2, 2013
Okay I just read this...and HOLY CRAP.
Collin, you are incredible!
This is so perfect in every single way. I absolutely love your choice of words and the way you structure your poems.
Honestly, you HAVE to pursue this talent, I am speechless.

xx Dzeni
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Apr 2, 2013   General Artist
hey Dzeni :)

thank you so much for your lovely words. Both you and Lena are such nice people. It's always nice when you admire someone's work for a long time and then get to know the person (or people) behind it and find they are someone who you would like to friends with. Makes it all the more special when you find yourself inspired by their work too, like I am with yours.

hope you are having a great day!

Collin
Reply
:iconmexicanpedo:
mexicanpedo Featured By Owner Apr 3, 2013
Very true my dear :) You are always welcome!
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:iconmawwyfawwie13:
mawwyfawwie13 Featured By Owner Mar 27, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
Well that hit close to home.
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Mar 28, 2013   General Artist
thank you for commenting :)
Reply
:iconmawwyfawwie13:
mawwyfawwie13 Featured By Owner Mar 28, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
Thank you for writing. I liked it, and it was meaningful.
Just hit close to home.
Reply
:iconmaddyaxstevens:
maddyaxstevens Featured By Owner Mar 27, 2013
I can relate this to my life right now. I can understand how she feels. It's the one of the worst feelings you can go through.
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Mar 28, 2013   General Artist
yeah, I agree with that. Thanks for taking time to read this poem and comment :)
Reply
:iconeclectic-reception:
eclectic-reception Featured By Owner Mar 27, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I enjoyed this because I can relate. I also thought it had a nice flow, and I liked the rhyming pattern.
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Mar 27, 2013   General Artist
thank you, glad you enjoyed it and felt it had a nice flow as that is something I have worked on :)
Reply
:iconthedarknesskitten:
TheDarknessKitten Featured By Owner Mar 27, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Lovely, :D
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Mar 27, 2013   General Artist
thank you :)
Reply
:iconthedarknesskitten:
TheDarknessKitten Featured By Owner Mar 27, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
You're welcome! :D
Reply
:iconmagic-waffles:
Magic-Waffles Featured By Owner Mar 27, 2013  Student Digital Artist
Wow this is beautiful! :heart:
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Mar 27, 2013   General Artist
aww thanks :)
Reply
:iconstrudel--cutie4427:
Strudel--Cutie4427 Featured By Owner Mar 27, 2013   Writer
This is absolutely brilliantly beautiful and if you're this good and you say they're talented, well I should DEFFINATELY look now!
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Mar 27, 2013   General Artist
thank you so much :) Very kind of you.
Reply
:iconstrudel--cutie4427:
Strudel--Cutie4427 Featured By Owner Mar 27, 2013   Writer
You're right, they are talented! If only I knew how to make DDs this would be up first, followed by about half their gallery... Now just to watch you! (already watched them)
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Mar 27, 2013   General Artist
oh I am really flattered you should say that :) I have always wondered how the DD system works. But never expected one as there are so many wonderful writers on this site.
Reply
:iconstrudel--cutie4427:
Strudel--Cutie4427 Featured By Owner Mar 28, 2013   Writer
Well this is better than some of the DD's I've seen (no offence to them) hmmm, I'll ask one of my friends who may...
Reply
:iconstrudel--cutie4427:
Strudel--Cutie4427 Featured By Owner Mar 27, 2013   Writer
You're right, they are talented! If only I knew how to make DDs this would be up first, followed by about half their gallery... Now just to watch you! (already watched them)
Reply
:iconcaptivewhispers:
CaptiveWhispers Featured By Owner Mar 27, 2013  Hobbyist Photographer
This is amazing. I can relate to this. Very well done.
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Mar 27, 2013   General Artist
thank you, really glad you liked it :)
Reply
:iconcecilyrosemidnight:
CecilyRoseMidnight Featured By Owner Mar 27, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Such a relatable poem! I love how well written this poem is, and how you phrase things differently than how they are normally phrased.
Your poetic prowess never ceases to make me jealous. XD
...
I feel like I've been stalked because this poem describes my life, unfortunately.... (I kid, but there is a sad truth to my words.)
Reply
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