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Take Another PillWhen I was just a child
About twenty years back
I never would have thought
I would turn out like that
Or indeed like this
If I speak in the present tense
I guess I’m tense in the present
If that makes any sense

When I was at the mercy
Of the medical profession
They told me I was suffering
With clinical depression
And tapestries woven this tight
Into such an infant mind
Would be difficult to unspool
Unthread and leave behind

When I was just a boy
Around ten or so years back
I fell into a deep hole
But it felt more like a trap
I couldn’t get out of there
In fact I’m stuck here still
And all anyone can do
Is to prescribe anot

Only When I WriteThe drama unfurling in my life
Feels like the shadow of my hand
That grows as it comes ever closer
To the light perched on my bed stand
In that I can feel the darkest cloud
Ever such a menacing sight
In time I can reverse the feeling
But only when I write

Seclusion left me with nothing
Apart from creativity
Loneliness it turns out, my friends
Is quite the aperitif
For the feast that is awaiting me
If I make it through the night
Tomorrow always brings me new hope
But only when I write

You approach me on a good day
And I will offer you a smile
The same expression on the worst days
Because my manners are so mild
But don’t take me for a t

Beautifully Flawed Wild AnimalsAs a child I was kicked by a horse
While approaching from behind
It knocked me clean across the stable
This fragile framed boy of nine
I tried so hard to be strong and brave
And as Mother wiped my tears away
All I could think was I must return
To the stable the very next day

I barely slept a wink that night
For thinking about the steed
And how the doctor said I‘d be dead
If hoof had hit below my knee
Running my hand over the horseshoe
That was bruised onto my thigh
I felt a very real connection
Between the animal and I

Mother woke me as dawn broke
Asked if I still wanted to go
To visit the scene of the crime
To visit my equus foe
I n

Whatever Is To DoWe were ever so worried
When we found the knotted noose
And scribbled diary entries
With tales of self abuse

Teenage tears and tantrums
Can easily be explained
But what on earth would cause these
Freshly dripped blood stains

We were ever so worried
When you locked yourself in your room
Painted the walls pitch black
And ignorantly we assumed

That this was just a phase
That it would soon come to pass
And pass it indeed did do
Far too soon and far too fast

We were ever so worried
When you dyed black your hair
No longer did we recognise
The child that was once here

Our precious little angel
Where did your shaken bones go
And

The Deepest Depths of BlueThe chain of events that followed your birth
Were as tumultuous as each twisted link
Your mind was wired for the written word
But under no circumstances should you think

As the decreasing circles of sanity
Will ripple through your infant mind
The soul can't escape your hollow bones
Until you leave those thoughts behind

You feel trapped inside your grey matter
But freedom will be yours in the end
Once you realise that you are a miracle
That'll never be repeated again

Open your eyes to the beauty of the truth
That there is a reality worth seeing
And dive into the deepest depths of blue
Of your soul, your essence, your being

Life Is An Intravenous DripLife is an intravenous drip
With no transfusion of blood
Instead it slowly relieves me
Of a mind that once was good

Administering paranoia
Directly from the drip chamber
Suffocating me with terror
When there is no imminent danger

Life is an intravenous drip
I am fascinated by my veins
And curious as to which one
Carries the blood to my brain

Which causes the unwanted impulse
For me to question every answer
Tourniquet that varicose vessel
Curiosity is my cancer

Life is an intravenous drip
Of that I am A positive
My blood remains optimistic
So why am I so negative

I see no saline solution
Just diminishing vital signs
As my sanity transfuse

RemedyA chemical reaction
Akin to the wings of a dove
You feel a karmic wind change
From this feeling called love

As I unfurl my wings
To the plague in your heart
I am your remedy
Now the healing can start

A spiritual moment
A timely epiphany
Everything in its right place
Just as it's meant to be

As I unfurl my wings
To the plague in your mind
Within the darkest caverns
I will bring you sunshine

A healing process
We will soothe each other's sores
My love, you are my life line
As much as I am yours

As we spread our arms
Two souls embrace as one
Your remedy is my cure
And our symptoms are now gone

Daydreamers Amongst UsTo those daydreamers amongst us
Tomorrow will soon be today
So choose every word carefully
As they might be the last you say

And they will echo through time
After your final shadow is cast
But those words and those emotions
Will have no place in the past

They'll take their place in tomorrow
And every day to the end of time
Your words, your thoughts and your wisdom
Will deviate us from straight lines

And show people there's another way
Peace and love can re-wire our brains
Show us how to avoid hatred
And from negative feelings refrain

Otherwise I can see suffering
But on an unheard of scale
Nations and religions will collide

Target WeightI am afraid because I know
That I will never arrive
At a point where I am nourished
And emotionally satisfied

So to regulate my mood
I consume levels that disgrace
They suppose that this is greed
That assumption is misplaced

I’m addicted to the feeling
The short term stimulation
But that only makes me more prone
To those feelings of deflation

And stomach cramps and pains
Loose skin hanging from my bones
Eyes sinking into my skull
And those deathly grey skin tones

Will I ever fill the hole
Silence those voices for a while
I prepare my gut for sorrow
While I am spoon fed on denial

But life’s too much to digest
An acid reflux ep

Repulsive By DesignLet me tell you this my friend
And I will tell you no more
If my passion is your crime
Then your love should be my law

I’m the exception to the rule
And the end of this blood line
I should hang my head in shame
I am repulsive by design

Allow me to elucidate
And I will tell you no lie
I am charged with being charmless
And I have no alibi

Feloniously you broke my heart
One chamber at a time
Though I’d expect nothing less
I am repulsive by design

Beware of the broken hearted
Indeed consider with caution
Repulsion cleansed my sorry soul
Such a spiritual abortion

But when a full term of sorrow
And low self esteem combine
I still r

Take My Blood InsteadEvery morning without fail
I wake up at 5 o'clock
My bones are aware of something
Of which my mind is not

They tell me to move forward
Propelling me from my bed
Don't drain me of ambition
Please take my blood instead

Every morning without fail
The sun shines on where I lay
Characters in place, stage is set
What'll fate offer me today

Mister mundane mumbles
From his melancholic head
Don't rob me of the sunlight
Please take my blood instead

Every morning without fail
You give me belief in fate
Before this pensive pillow
Is lowered to suffocate

Fake feathers smother my face
There will be no tears shed
Don't take their memo

Beneath The Ice SheetIt was a lonely cold winter's day
Not cold enough to freeze the leaves
But cold enough that as I exhale
It made visible this air that I breathe

The frozen grass around the pond
Creaks under my lead weight feet
Only fog alone will now obscure
What lies beneath the ice sheet

Are mine the only eyes to see her
Why is she still in her night clothes
Will she not be cold alone down there
Perhaps she has long since froze

And if so how does she talk to me
Knowing exactly how I think
Staring so long into her face
One day I'm sure I saw her blink

It was a lonely cold winter's day
I'd been here many times before
My parents told me to st

Letters LiveThe middle three letters of the word “Earth”
Spell out the word “art”
This is fitting because when I create
The beauty of the world is where I start

The middle three letters of the word “believe”
Spell out the word “lie”
This is fitting because for all those who accede
There are an equal amount who deny

The middle three letters of the word “lonely”
Spell out the word “one”
This is fitting because I have felt isolated
Ever since you have been gone

The middle two letters of the word “life”
Spell out the word “if”
This is fitting because only when

The Man Who BurnsI am too sterile and static
I can feel you walking away
Into the arms of the man who burns
But then again why would you stay

He is so young and beautiful
He lives life while I rehearse
Acting upon his desires
While I write about mine in verse

Our love was Russian roulette
Without bullets in the chamber
Passing the gun back and forth
Without any sense of danger

The fire in your heart has gone now
This cliché is not lost on me
Metaphorically I'm the water
That dampened our destiny

You said you would never leave me
But this contract was never binding
I want you to find your freedom
If there's a freedom worth finding

Bey

Tragic AuthorI’m looking forward to being a tragic author
I’ll sit on a cloud with no silver lining
And become the male equivalent of a spinster
With words as my spouse and books as my offspring

At least then it is I who will control the outcome
For the lives of my heroes and heroines
And since I’ll not be afforded a happy ending
The least I can do is to give one to them

The Lord said ‘no’ to my happily ever after
Perhaps to inspire my imagination
A hollowed out heart is an ideal home after all
For my mind’s perpetual inspiration

I’m looking forward to being a tragic author
I’m such a devoted, hopeless ro

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More from *Rifle1980

Dead at 16My worries are a reservoir
Her worries are a lake
In that they’re very real indeed
Whereas mine are very fake

Invented to seek attention
Lies, oh despicable lies
One day I’ll drown in metaphors
Please be sure to sympathise

But while you show me this concern
Who'll be looking out for her
Blood curdling screams from my mouth
She is nil by mouth and verse

I have cried wolf so many times
She can’t even cry her own tears
My lies are spun in silk cobwebs
My spinneret shrouding your ears

I spoon fed you daily doses
So it was easier to digest
I planted those seeds of sorrow
Your fertile mind did the rest

Lies, all those despica

That Girl In The MirrorHappiness will remain forever out of reach
When love from your life you omit
To the girl in the mirror; you are beautiful
Yet somehow you never quite fit

Not the girl they thought you’d turn out to be
When you were a neonate child
Born with a raging heart and a raging mind
But with a manner ever so mild

Your scars aren’t always visible to them
And not only hidden under attire
Lacerations to the mind are just as abhorrent
When memories and dreams conspire

So girl break the mirror if you have to
And reflect on your life as a whole
Do you really want to spend the rest of your days
Behind a façade of self control?

Please be strong

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Air Born

by *Rifle1980, Feb 26, 2013, 2:32:01 PM
Literature / Poetry / General Poetry / Free Verse

I compare my parents courtship
To a plane taking to the sky
The ascent is the conception
Of me, my inner self and I

And should I survive the full term
From utero I shall emerge
As I jump from the aeroplane
Spiralling my way down to Earth

Descending through the atmosphere
I discern that this is my life
As the weather reflects my mood
From the sunshine to lightning strikes

The clouds they tend to come and go
As I tumble my way on through
A metaphor for life’s problems
Small dilemmas to big issues

But I choose not to close my eyes
As terra firma comes into sight
Even though death approaches me
At the unerring speed of life

If I open my parachute
If I open my torrid mind
A soft landing will greet my bones
As my soul leaves this world behind