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:iconrifle1980: More from Rifle1980


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Literature and Journals by rainbowrat25

Poems by Jacolin

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Submitted on
August 23, 2012
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I was just nineteen years old
When I cut myself in two
The boy I wanted them to see
And the boy they never knew

Hid my hollow bones away
I've been hiding ever since
Yes, you may see the odd smile
But only ever a glimpse

But my heart was never broken
It was born in several pieces
And with every passing year
The size of the segments decreases

I was just nineteen years old
When I died for the first time
I did not cope so well
With leaving my childhood behind

I didn't want to face up
To these wretched bent back blues
But will I give in to the struggle?
No, with respect I refuse

See my grandfather gave me
The stubborn heart of an ox
I will die before I collapse
A coward I am not
..
Add a Comment:
 
:iconsimbalonso:
Simbalonso Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
This is brilliant! 
You have a lot of talent and thanks for sharing it :handshake: :clap:
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:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2014   General Artist
aww thank you for the comment and the fave :)
Reply
:iconsimbalonso:
Simbalonso Featured By Owner Nov 4, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
You're welcome :pat:
Reply
:iconennailaughter:
ennailaughter Featured By Owner Oct 17, 2014  Student General Artist
Your poetry is impossibly beautiful, you sir have an extreme amount of talent :)
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Oct 17, 2014   General Artist
:) very kind of you to say so. I see you have watched me too, i appreciate that a lot :)
Reply
:iconennailaughter:
ennailaughter Featured By Owner Oct 17, 2014  Student General Artist
you are welcome :) and you definitely deserved it
Reply
:iconnotensmsk:
NotenSMSK Featured By Owner Apr 16, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
A nice rhyme and over all very well written. I liked the message and how it described the "Die before defeat" concept however in a strange manner I guess ^^;
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Apr 16, 2014   General Artist
hey :) I am glad you enjoyed it. I like to add a little strangeness whenever possible lol

thanks for the comment :)
Reply
:iconnotensmsk:
NotenSMSK Featured By Owner Apr 16, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
You are very welcome :)
Reply
:iconjhadelapena:
jhadelapena Featured By Owner Dec 9, 2013  Hobbyist Photographer
I can't..
just WOW!
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Dec 11, 2013   General Artist
thank you :)
Reply
:iconpoemgirl15:
Poemgirl15 Featured By Owner Nov 6, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
asdfghj this is perfection!
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Nov 9, 2013   General Artist
aww thank you! and thanks for the fave too :)
Reply
:iconpoemgirl15:
Poemgirl15 Featured By Owner Nov 11, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
np :)
Reply
:iconshadowboxer23:
shadowboxer23 Featured By Owner Oct 29, 2013
This is beautiful!
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Nov 4, 2013   General Artist
thank you! :)
Reply
:iconamyaime:
amyaime Featured By Owner Oct 16, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
the ending 
I cant even
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Oct 18, 2013   General Artist
aww thank you for reading and commenting :)
Reply
:iconjunsuishinzou:
JunsuiShinzou Featured By Owner Sep 11, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Very beautiful.
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Sep 12, 2013   General Artist
thank you :)
Reply
:iconleanlioncourt:
leanlioncourt Featured By Owner Sep 7, 2013
Parfait, monsieur. Très belle. REALLY good. (:
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Sep 8, 2013   General Artist
thank you so much :) merci :D
Reply
:iconwolfgang627:
Wolfgang627 Featured By Owner Sep 5, 2013  Student General Artist
beautiful.
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Sep 5, 2013   General Artist
thank you :) and thanks for the fave too.
Reply
:iconxraynebloodx:
xRayneBloodx Featured By Owner Sep 4, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
This is beautiful ;-; 
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Sep 4, 2013   General Artist
thank you :)
Reply
:iconsarawiseman:
SaraWiseman Featured By Owner Sep 3, 2013  Hobbyist Photographer
Leaves me wondering what the other half isn't saying.
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Sep 4, 2013   General Artist
yep :) thank you for taking time to read and comment.
Reply
:iconadventuredude503:
AdventureDude503 Featured By Owner Aug 21, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
This is absolutley beautiful. Written beautifully as well, by far on of my favourite poems I've found here on da. Really Sad :clap: :hug: 
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Aug 22, 2013   General Artist
wow such a kind comment, thank you :) There is some amazing work on this site so i really do take that as a huge compliment
Reply
:iconadventuredude503:
AdventureDude503 Featured By Owner Aug 22, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
You're very welcome! Thanks for sharing, it was a pleasure to read! :)
Reply
:iconsarahblerg:
Sarahblerg Featured By Owner Jul 30, 2013
them feels. <3 I adore this. Makes me feel less crazy :P beautifully written.
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Jul 31, 2013   General Artist
:) that means a lot to me that you would say that. To make someone feel less alone or crazy is very special for me.

thank you!
Reply
:iconyuuza:
Yuuza Featured By Owner Jun 17, 2013  Professional Digital Artist
i love it, i think actually that everyone develops a second self around adolescence :) we are all torn in half more or less :)
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Jun 19, 2013   General Artist
:) really glad you like it, thank you.
Reply
:iconjokerrlaughs:
JokerrLaughs Featured By Owner Jun 13, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Very well written and excellent concept.
I can really relate.
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Jun 14, 2013   General Artist
thank you very much :)
Reply
:iconizzyizz303:
izzyizz303 Featured By Owner Jun 10, 2013  Hobbyist Photographer
:iconsadplz:
Reply
:iconrifle1980:
Rifle1980 Featured By Owner Jun 11, 2013   General Artist
:icontissuesplz: tissue time for you :)

thanks for reading and commenting :)
Reply
:iconizzyizz303:
izzyizz303 Featured By Owner Jun 14, 2013  Hobbyist Photographer
you're welcome
Reply
:iconroseandbeast:
RoseandBeast Featured By Owner May 29, 2013  Hobbyist Artist
*crys* omfg......I have so much respect for this. i honestly understand. I Love this .
Reply
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